Can't relax?
Succeed with these great ways to relax

The ways to relax described here, include how to do progressive muscle relaxation, one of the best stress relaxation techniques, and a great physical, mental and emotional progressive relaxation.

The stress reducers and relaxation tips described below are vital tools in how to deal with stress and may be used at any time, for example:

* as a special relaxation session (when you are on your own with no distractions)

* during the course of your normal day (most of these ways to relax will be invisible to others, with a little practice)

* as part of practising meditation techniques (e.g. mindful meditation).

One of the very well tried and tested ways to relax that is easy to use is to pay attention to your breathing.

When you slow down your breathing your minds (especially your conscious mind), emotions and your body will synchronise and also let go tension and stress.

It sounds simple, and it is, and it is also one of the best ways to relax.

This works best if you breathe with your diaphragm rather than with your chest.

You may have already mastered this as part of your self-hypnosis process.

If not, this is how to do diaphragmatic breathing:

Take a deep breath in.

Breathe out and just when you think you have done so as far as you can, breathe out a little more as you pull your tummy in and up.

You are now at the starting point for diaphragm breathing.

Breathe in by letting out your tummy as far as you can.

Then, keep breathing in by expanding your chest.

Complete your in breath by raising your shoulders.

If it helps your learning, use a count of 15: i.e. count up to 5 as you breathe in by letting out your tummy; count 6 - 10 as your breathe in by expanding your chest; and count 11 - 15 as you complete your in breath by raising your shoulders.

Now, breathe out firstly by lowering your shoulders; then contracting your chest; and finally by pulling your tummy in and upwards (use a count of 15 for this out breath if it helps).

You've now completed ONE breath using diaphragmatic breathing (which can be used in all of the ways to relax and at any time).

You may need to practice a little on your own to develop the habit of diaphragm breathing.

Not only will it help you to be calm and relaxed, but it will also yield valuable benefits in terms of your general health.

Stress relaxation techniques:

One technique, using your breath, is to breathe in to a slow count of 5 and then breathe out immediately for a slow count of 7 (a longer out breath than in breath is a key to inducing calm and relaxation).

Continue to repeat this cycle for 3-4 minutes (or longer if you’re feeling very tense or restless).

After counting the first few cycles, physically just follow the rhythm that this has set and then free your mind by imagining your favourite, safe, inspiring and relaxing place.

For me this is a beautiful place in the Yorkshire Dales and as I imagine myself there I feel very calm.

A key point is to create in your mind the feelings of being calm and relaxed, safe and secure, as you mentally visit your favourite place, your “sanctuary”.

Make your image as vivid as you can using all of your senses.

See your sanctuary in detail and full colour.

Hear any sounds, or smell any smells, that would be there.

Touch what can be touched and feel the wind or sun (or whatever would apply in your sanctuary).

Vividly imagine that you are really there whilst, all the time, you are using your breathing rhythm. This is one of the simplest and most effective ways to relax.

Usually, the above techniques will be sufficient to enable you to relax but if you have had a particularly bad day, or you are feeling very tense or anxious, you may also want to use other ways to relax.

You may choose to do the following progressive muscle relaxation.

This stress reducer involves tensing and letting go all of the major muscle groups of your body, as follows:

Adopt a comfortable position and begin by breathing as described above. Visit your sanctuary if you wish and / or do the following whilst there.

Start with your toes and feet and tense them up for a count of 5 before letting go and feeling a great sense of release.

Then move onto your legs and tense them for a count of 5 before letting go.

Then, in turn, tense up and let go your thighs, buttocks, stomach, hands, neck and shoulders, face and scalp until your whole body is feeling relaxed and calm.

Repeat if you feel it necessary.

Practice is vital.

You have nothing to lose here, and a lot to gain.

You won’t do any harm in learning this progressive muscle relaxation technique and a relaxed state is the one where you will perform at your best and reduce stress.

Practice these simple ways to relax until they become habitual and you can use them to be calm at will and relieve stress.

They will help you to reduce stress, control your emotions and stay calm and reasonable, even if provoked.

Finally, if you need to let go mentally or emotionally, in addition to the above ways to relax, you may choose to use visualisation to help a progressive relaxation technique, as follows:

Adopt a comfortable position and begin by using the breathing techniques described above.

After a few cycles, imagine that you are on the seventh floor of a building.

Looking around you see that the walls, ceiling and floor are all painted a bright red colour.

The number 7 is painted on the walls in white.

You walk slowly through this red room until you arrive at an escalator going down.

The escalator is very safe, very secure, and very strong.

You step onto the escalator and begin to descend slowly to the sixth floor.

As you descend you say, "I am totally relaxed, physically, emotionally and mentally, and I am going down, down, down, deeper, deeper, deeper feeling completely calm and healed".

You have now arrived at the sixth floor and you step off the escalator.

You notice that the walls, ceiling and floor here are all painted a bright orange colour, with the number 6 painted on the walls in black.

You walk slowly through this orange room until you arrive at an escalator going down.

The escalator is very safe, secure and strong.

You step onto it and begin to descend slowly to the fifth floor.

As you descend you say the same affirmations as above. Add in extra affirmations if you wish to reinforce the accumulative relaxing effect as you descend to each floor.

Continue going down all the floors, numbered from 5 to 1, and coloured to match the rainbow (i.e. yellow, green, blue, indigo and violet).


Each of these ways to relax will act as a powerful stress reducer and put you in control of your emotions, thinking and physical relaxation.

Taken together, these simple, easy to do, stress relaxation techniques will yield massive benefits for you and your continued well-being.

You may also choose to use music to support these ways to relax, of course. The best type of music to use is baroque (e.g. Handel or Bach) which has a tempo of 60 beats per minute.

Music relates directly to the limbic system in your brain and you will relax as your minds, emotions and physiology synchronises with the slow baroque beat.

Make these ways to relax habits and achieve your best performance, to visit your sanctuary, to tap the power of your unconscious mind and to achieve success in your self improvement programme.
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