Self esteem building need not be a mystery.
Use these 11 self esteem building activities to succeed.

This page describes 11 self esteem building techniques that are valuable steps to increase self confidence and that will show you how to build self esteem (even if you have no self confidence).

Self esteem building:

Let's start with a brief revision from our "Self esteem activities" web page which gives a definition of self esteem as: confidence in your own worth or abilities. In short, what is self esteem?, it is self respect.

Your self esteem is likely to vary depending on circumstances and your overall well being, of course, and there may be times when we need to know how to build self esteem or how do we go about overcoming low self esteem.

In particular, the values and beliefs you hold are powerful influences.

Listed below are 11 effective and successful, proactive, self esteem building activities used by achievers to build self esteem:

1. raise your awareness of how you are talking / communicating with yourself about yourself.

Become aware of any negative self-talk (or other symptoms of low self esteem) and, whenever it occurs, challenge it.

As a minimum, re-balance the negative self-talk by creating positive self-talk (eg try the ratio of 2:1, for every one negative thing said, say at least two positive things), and get into the habit of doing so.

This is a valuable technique, ofter under-rated, for improving self esteem.

2. list out your achievements - any and all achievements - and give yourself credit for what you’ve done.

Use this list to think about your purpose and goal setting as important self esteem building aids.

Reflect on the behaviours that resulted in these achievements.

In particular, consider how proactive you were and how you used your power.

What learning will you take from your experiences to enable further self help in how to build self esteem?

3. seek out someone who you perceive to have high self esteem and who you can use as a role model for self esteem building.

Examine what they do, and how they do it, that makes them confident and in control.

This may (or may not) include you taking on the role of an “actor” (one of the ways to boost self confidence).

That is, even if you are not feeling confident or in control, imagine you are being asked to act out the role of someone who is, and then step outside yourself and act confidently with high self esteem

4. de-sensitise any anxiety creating self-consciousness that you might have.

This usually takes some determination, and practice, and might involve you in:

* practicing how to relax at will

* preparing thoroughly, and rehearsing in your mind how you will respond to situations

* practicing letting go of your fear and concentrating on the other person or situation

* using some self hypnosis techniques. Click here for how to do self hypnosis and for an example self hypnosis script.

5. take a hard look in the mirror about your condition - are you fit and healthy physically, mentally and emotionally?

You may choose proactive self help by setting yourself some goals or embarking on an improvement programme of some sort.

For example, you may choose to make changes in your diet or exercise (consult your medical adviser first, of course) or take up yoga or meditation or study inspirational books or CDs or......whatever.

There is no doubt that, whilst this can be difficult for some people, being proactive in improving your condition is a significant self esteem building strategy.

6. create a way of capturing the positives about yourself and how you have learned as a result.

This could be, for example, to start using a learning log or journal or diary; or maybe a scrap book; or an audio or video diary or.....whatever works for you.

This is not narcissism or an ego trip - the key is to use the captured positives to learn and, as a result, further improve self esteem, your powers of persuasion, self confidence and control

7. use your creative imagination to visualise yourself demonstrating the self image and self esteem that you will need if you are to be proactive and in control.

This is a very useful technique for managing stress when the going gets tough.

You may need to think about, and make explicit, your self-ideal - your perception of the ideal person you want to be

8. manage your inner critic by, for example:

* seeking feedback on your achievements

* re-framing negative thoughts from limitations (eg “you can’t do that”) into possibilities (“I can and I will do XXX instead”)

* and rewarding yourself for being proactive

9. maintain perspective - periodically, check on the seriousness and significance of the situation you are in.

Ask yourself, “how might this seem in 10 years time?”, and if the answer is, “we’ll have a good laugh about it then”, well, why wait?

Where appropriate, have a good laugh now - humour is often a very effective self esteem building technique

10. have a mental sanctuary you can go to quickly and at will whenever your self image is under attack (either by you or others).

Use this sanctuary as part of your self hypnosis process

11. persevere with the above self esteem building activities, or other ways that suit you, until you develop the habit of choosing success (whatever that means, and feels like, for you) and not settling for anything less.

Apply this self help excellence mindset at both the micro (every little thing you do) and the macro (achieving your purpose and goals) levels in your self esteem building.

Click here for some inspiring perseverance quotes to stimulate your self esteem.

Finally, click on this link to explore the significance and value of determination and self discipline in building and maintaining high self esteem.

Self esteem building is vital for self improvement but is not necessarily a pre-condition. For example, using self hypnosis, being proactive, and developing your power will ensure self help to build self esteem.
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If you're looking for more information about self esteem and personal development relating to motherhood (opens in a new window), visit http://www.all-about-motherhood.com/

If you are seeking more information on the efforts of poor communities in helping transform society and want to explore the wealth of meanings woven everyday in poor communities (opens in a new window), visit http://www.self-esteemandcommunityorganizing.com/index.html

If you want to learn about dealing with depression (opens in a new window), visit The Depression Test website which is not like any other website you'll find out there! Why? Because it is designed and developed with your needs in mind. Not only will it provide you with solid, helpful information, but it will provide you with tools that will empower you to fight the battle of depression and win!!

If you want lasting happiness and fulfillment, connected loving relationships, respect and admiration from your family and friends, optimal health and vitality and to live a life you love - check this out (this will open a new window) Live a Life of Abundance and Prosperity


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