Persuasion techniques rule, ok?
But HOW do you do it
and enjoy it?

Persuasion techniques, to be effective, need an understanding of what is persuasion and the elements of persuasion needed for a smooth process. This page explains how to persuade others successfully.

What is persuasion?:

Think of it this way.

If you were to watch someone using persuasion techniques with their family and friends, having just told you that they cannot “sell” or persuade, you would probably find that they certainly could and that they were were having a lot of fun doing it.

You may see the person using their communication skills, and persuasion techniques, on his or her brother to borrow some money or his favourite CD.

You may see the person persuading someone to go to see a particular film or show.

You may see him or her using their power to persuade friends to watch a TV programme or buy a pizza.

And you would probably see a lot of fun and banter in the process of using persuasion techniques.

And yet, many of us feel that persuasion is something "not quite nice".

Aren't we trying to get someone to buy something when we persuade them?

Aren't we selling?

Yes. Persuasion techniques are designed to "sell"

And persuading is a key communication skill that helps you to achieve influence with others and vital learning.

You can win over others by convincing them that there are benefits to achieve from whatever it is you want to influence them to do.

The key word here is benefits.

The tools of persuasion are centred on benefits:

When you buy something (whether it be a car or insurance or a holiday or an idea or a donation to a charity), you don’t really buy what it is, you buy what you believe it will do for you.

You buy the benefits. You buy, your perception of, “what’s in it for you?”

Now it may not be obvious what’s in it for you - the fundamental purpose of using persuasion techniques is to make it obvious what the benefits are.

In fact, you may start out believing that there is nothing in it for you, or even that it is going to be to your detriment to buy it, and that’s where there’s a strong need for persuasion (i.e. providing a sound reason for someone to do something).

And here’s an interesting thought - if you persuade me to buy it (even though I didn’t want it at first), and I achieve benefits by doing so (ie I gain things that I value and wouldn’t have had unless you had influenced me), you’ve just done me a big favour, and I should sincerely thank you - don't you agree?

Children are great natural persuaders, aren’t they? So are you.

So, to be in control, and influence others, sometimes you will need to use persuasion techniques.

If you feel reluctant to do this (eg because it feels like, sounds like, or is, “selling”, and that has negative connotations in your mind), please re-read the above and, in addition, consider these two points:

1. you will be persuading people to buy something that will benefit them (in a small number of cases this may not be true - eg you may be persuading someone to buy or do something that will benefit others).

Now why wouldn’t you want to help people achieve benefits that they won’t get unless you explain it to them? (they still may reject it, of course. You can’t make anyone buy anything).

2. if you are unwilling to use your persuasion techniques, maybe you don’t believe it yourself?

If you won’t buy, how do you expect anyone else to? More importantly, though, why are you trying to influence someone to something you don’t believe in?

If any of this is valid, the problem isn’t with persuading others, the problem is with you.

Alright, what are the elements of persuasion? How do you persuade someone?

One approach involves a four step process, as follows:

1. explore
Find out if the person has a need for whatever it is you are trying to persuade them about, and if they have the power to buy it, and the resources (e.g. money, time).

In particular, use the golden triangle of communications. Click here for a definition of communication and click here to learn about communication barriers.

2. convince
This is where you use your persuasion techniques and communication skills to explain what's in it for them? - what are the benefits they will achieve?

It will be important to pay attention to the non-verbal language that is being used - body language - as this is a very revealing expression of someone's inner feelings.

3. address objections
However, the person may have some objections to your persuasion. And, if you use the golden triangle of communication skills to really listen, you will have important learning about what it is they need extra persuasion about.

That is, their objection has just told you what they need convincing about - isn't that really helpful of them?

4. decide
Finally, help the person to commit to achieve the benefits. Help them to decide (e.g. to take whatever action is appropriate).

A detailed explanation of each of these steps is available in my e-book, "My Future, My Choice".

Do someone a favour. Use persuasion techniques to help them gain benefits (even if it wasn't obvious to them, or you, when you started out).
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